Monday, November 28, 2016

Monday's Message ~ Statement #2




 
 
“You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind.”  -Joyce Meyer

“Negative emotions like loneliness, envy, and guilt have an important role to play in a happy life; they’re big flashing signs that something needs to change.”  -Gretchen Rubin
 
“The most important aspect of negative thoughts is that these thoughts always precede drinking bouts.  A state of ‘what’s the use?’ or ‘who cares?’ is the initiator for escape from reality.”
-Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D., WFS Program Booklet
 
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Statement #2, “Negative thoughts destroy only myself.”
My first conscious sober act must be to remove negativity from my life.
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+ Karen’s Perspective +
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        This time of year can bring about thoughts or emotions unequal with the season; feelings of loneliness, agitation or lack of feeling anything can invade the senses and create unbalance and shift perspective.  Sobriety and Statement #2 in action can end a cycle of negativity before it can take a strong hold while unleashing feelings of well-being and harmony.
        Awareness of negativity is the beginning of managing and reducing negativity.  The goal is not to eliminate negativity completely for it can provide a purpose; it can serve as a reminder of emotional work that may need tending to.  Once aware, energy can then be applied to the management of negativity.  Meditation, writing in a journal or speaking one’s needs are each great ways to manage negativity and feel centered again.
        This week, make it a priority to identify feelings within you.  Notice what brings a smile to your heart and what interferes with your inner balance.  Carve out time from all the seasonal preparations to just simply be.  Breathe.  Create a 4(C) point plan to manage negativity.  Soak in the twinkling lights.  Take in the delicious aromas and give yourself the gift of your own presence.
Every day I manage my thoughts and feelings.
  Hugzzz, Karen

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+  Member Insights  +
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Hi 4C Women,
        Identifying feelings can be quite daunting, especially around the holidays when the senses are so bombarded with what may seem like downright demands that we feel constantly happy, joyful and full of gleeful feelings.  For many, this is a time of feeling stressed about meeting expectations, worrying about financial repercussions from spending too much, healing from loss and the deep loneliness that can result from that.
        As women learning to cope with these intensified feelings around the holidays, there is support and understanding within the WFS community of group members and the forum.  We have a place to share our authentic feelings and work through them.  I have found that when I hold feelings in, they become too powerful and I can feel myself shutting down, judging myself too harshly that I “should” be beyond these strong, negative feelings.  When I acknowledge these feelings, I can begin to use them to look at their origin, their truth, and figure out a way to turn these negative feelings into positive ones.  For me, that is the power of WFS - recognizing that I am in charge of my mind, my thoughts and my life.  If I have that power, I have the choice to change my thinking.
        Please notice I didn’t say “ignore my feelings” as that is what got me drinking in the first place.  I ignored, buried, numbed and drank my way through my feelings.  I changed the way I reflected on my feelings and sought support, acceptance and caring from the WFS group along with therapy.  I discovered that there were a lot of old messages in my history that I brought with me into the present.  Old messages that continued to hurt me and became a wall of negative proof that I was unworthy, unlovable, and invisible to those who mattered to me.  Now with that kind of thinking, how in the world could I possibly sort out the truth from the messages and discard the lies I believed all my life?
        There is no magic formula.  There is only the willingness to work at change and keep the truth of who you really are close to your heart.  For that truth is the new foundation, the wall of positive choice that becomes the new habit of thinking.  The next time a negative thought begins to form in your mind, stop and replace it with “I am” (lovable, powerful, worthy...) and keep repeating it until it becomes the automatic thought that pops into your mind.  Most importantly, ask for help, seek support and practice Statement #2.  It works!  -WFS Member
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© WFS Inc. * Women for Sobriety, Inc., PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org  *  Ph: 215-536-8026  *  Fax: 215-538-9026
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C  *  Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services ~ Thank you!

Friday, November 25, 2016

Winter Sale & Handling the Holidays





By Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D. 

Price: $8.95    Sale Price: $5.45 

A diary of a one year publicity tour for Dr. Kirkpatrick’s book, Goodbye Hangovers, Hello Life.  Read about her many experiences meeting WFS group members and their moderators and doing speaking tours all across the U.S. 

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By Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D. 

Price: $16.95     Sale Price: $13.56 

A book about recovery - how it happens, what problems arise and how to overcome these problems.  Some chapters include: Taking Care of Number One, Self-Esteem, Mind Control For Life Control.”  Also included are three candid interviews with women alcoholics: a homemaker, a lesbian and a nun. 

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Price: $9.00    Sale Price: $6.00 

Actually there are TWO DESIGNS on this mug... one side says “HELLO LIFE” and the opposite side says "GO FOR IT" along with one of our favorite enthusiastic Statement Characters to cheer you on and brighten your day.  This classic shaped ceramic coffee mug holds 14 ounces and has a wide handle that fits comfortably in your hand and it is two-toned with the exterior color an energetic orange and the interior color a cheerful lighter shade of orange (looks sunshine yellow to wake you up!).  A wonderful gift for yourself, members of your group, and it makes a great gift for friends and family too.  The mug comes in its own box - perfect for gift-giving!  (There is no mention of WFS nor our information on the mug itself.) 

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Price: $5.95    Sale Price: $3.45 

WFS’s founder encouraged all women who are working the program to write down their thoughts and feelings on a daily basis.  This personal journal can be the beginning of your “New Life” adventures!  Size is 5x7 inches with 100 lined, spiral bound pages with a sturdy plastic cover and backing with a blue border and our WFS ‘woman on the mountain’ logo encircled with our 4C’s (capable, competent, caring, compassionate).  An elastic pen loop is attached to the Journal - a WFS pen is included!

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FREE U.S. SHIPPING ON ALL CDs & DVDs! 

Order must be placed separately.
Shipped cost will be removed when order is ready to be processed by the WFS office.
{Expires Dec. 15, 2016] 

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Empowering Thoughts Inspired by the Women for Sobriety 13 Statements, Volume 4, by Karen Hamm.  180 spiral-bound pages of inspirational, thought-provoking personal experiences from Karen as she works each of the 13 WFS Statements in her recovery journey. 

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In this series of booklets, we've gathered together articles (that were previously published in WFS's newsletter, Sobering Thoughts) with a certain topic in mind to help women, in their recovery, learn from the experiences and insight of women using the WFS Program.  This booklet is a great help with group meetings too!  These articles & more:

  • In Harm’s Way: Fighting the Holiday Temptation
  • Sharing Our Love
  • Delusion, Illusion, Disillusion
  • A New Year’s Plan
  • Handling Stress During Holiday Season
  • Gift Giving
  • My First Sober Holiday Season
  • Trying New Things for the Holidays
  • Those Families Again
  • Holiday & Coping
  • Fences of Freedom
  • Celebrate Sobriety!
  • I Give Thanks At This Time Of Year
  • Financial Perspective During the Holidays

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Start the New Year with:

Discounted Package includes:
Turnabout book, WFS Program & Beginner’s Booklets,
and The Woman Alcoholic CD. 

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Twelve small booklets that reflect a subject/emotion topic for each week of the month.  This bundle is a set of all 12 Booklets. 

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Deal Yourself A "New Life"!  This set of 13 playing sized cards contains one WFS Statement each.  Can be used daily to randomly pick a statement to work on, or in a group setting to select a statement for discussion.  NEW: One Mystery Bonus Card Included in Each Set! 

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REMEMBER WHEN CHECKING OUT IN THE SHOPPING CART - YOU HAVE CHOICE OF UPS OR USPS FOR SHIPPING WITHIN U.S.
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© WFS Inc. * Women for Sobriety, Inc., PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org  *  Ph: 215-536-8026  *  Fax: 215-538-9026
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C  *  Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services ~ Thank you!

YOU are here


By RAZZ

©     YOU are here, be thankful. 
 
©     YOU have a guide, be thankful for a program started by a brave and intelligent woman. 
 
©     YOU have found support, be thankful for all the awesome women who stand with you. 
 
©     YOU have found guidance, be thankful for the shared knowledge. 
 
©     YOU have found joy, be thankful for the milestones passed and the trials overcome. 
 
©     YOU have found compassion, be thankful for the many times others have shared your tears. 
 
©     YOU have found caring, be thankful for the women who believed in you before you did. 
 
©     YOU have found love, be thankful for the women who “loved” you because they understood you. 
 
©     YOU have found a home, be thankful for this safe place where you can be yourself and others will embrace you. 
 
©      YOU are here, be thankful!
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© WFS Inc. * Women for Sobriety, Inc., PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org  *  Ph: 215-536-8026  *  Fax: 215-538-9026
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C  *  Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services ~ Thank you!

Thursday, November 24, 2016

I Give Thanks ~ Article




Shirley Schuy ~ Guelph, Ontario, Canada


 


A
t this and every holiday season, I give thanks.  I give thanks that my family believed in me to get and stay sober.  I give thanks for this marvelous “New Life” Program, because it has shown me the way to living a more positive life.  I give thanks to the wonderful women I have met on the Internet, through the Sobering Thoughts Newsletter, by attending the WFS Conference (I highly recommend everyone to experience even one), and by attending the face-to-face meetings.  I give thanks to the phone calls and e-mails I receive daily from sisters on the same journey of recovery.
 

      When I feel down, I remember the WFS Statement, “Life can be ordinary or it can be great.  Greatness is mine by a conscious effort.”

      If I am frustrated, I remember, “Problems bother me only to the degree I permit them to.  I now better understand my problems and do not permit problems to overwhelm me.”

      These statements along with all the other statements get me through life and daily I have to remember that my sobriety is the first and foremost goal I have to work on.

      Happy holidays and think about what you have to give thanks for this holiday season. ΓΈ
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Which WFS Statement will you employ today?
 
How will you express gratitude on this Thanksgiving Day?
 
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© WFS Inc. * Women for Sobriety, Inc., PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org  *  Ph: 215-536-8026  *  Fax: 215-538-9026
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C  *  Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com

DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services ~ Thank you!

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Sober Game Plan for the Holidays



This is perfect timing with Thanksgiving in 2 days and Christmas next month!  Our long-time member, Julie aka SoberZilla, participated in the following article (see #8 on the list) to help everyone stay sober through all the temptations during the holidays.  Many thanks to drugrehab.org for hosting the article!




Monday, November 21, 2016

Monday's Message ~ Statement #7 & #10


“We can create the family we need.” 

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“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.”  -William Arthur Ward 

“Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received.  Thankfulness is the natural impulse to express that feeling.  Thanksgiving is the following of that impulse.”  -Henry Jackson Van Dyke

“I am grateful for what I am and have.  My thanksgiving is perpetual.”  -Henry David Thoreau

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Statement #7, “Love can change the course of my world.”  Caring becomes all important.
Statement #10, “All love given returns.”  I will learn to know that others love me.
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+ Karen’s Perspective +
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        This week many people will be celebrating the Thanksgiving holiday with fancy meals, family or friend get-togethers and, of course, shopping deals around every corner.  Additionally, for 4C women everywhere, it is also a time for connection, introspection, and gratitude.
        Holidays before sobriety and this incredible New Life, were focused on the exterior bling and alcohol.  Lost was the meaning behind the moment, replaced instead with drama, negativity and excess.  It was a time for more, still more and never enough.  Gratefully those days are gone but they did serve a purpose; they stand in direct contrast to today and pave the way for increasing contentment.
        For anyone new to sobriety, this time of year can bring about feelings of insecurity and worry.  Some women may ask themselves, “How can I handle this without alcohol?”  Know that you can!  Keep your sobriety plan close to you, connect with other women online/in-person, text or by phone and understand that you are creating a new history of sober holidays.  In our Program Booklet, Jean Kirkpatrick beautifully remarks, “Love is a powerful force.  It can change worlds and we must act to change our own world.”  Utilize Statements #7 and #10 to unleash caring, presence, and appreciation.
 
I am gratitude and love in action.
  Hugzzz, Karen

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+  Member Insights  +
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Hi 4C Women,
        Practicing gratitude takes time and effort until it becomes a habit.  Gratitude replaces the negative self-talk with positive self-talk.  Sometimes we call the negative self-talk our inner critic.  The critic carries messages from long, long ago and, yet, continually pops up in the present.
        In our New Life of sobriety, we are in charge of knocking that inner critic off our shoulder with all those untruths as we learn to love ourselves and be loved in return.  It’s being vulnerable and authentic.  Love cannot enter our lives if we are not vulnerable, to show our true selves with those who earned our trust.  While not everyone has close family, we can create the family we need.  It can be our 4C sisters, close friends, caring neighbors or others who are lonely and lost as the holidays approach.
        I was grocery shopping yesterday after church and getting last minute items, feeling rushed and overwhelmed, wanting everything to be right for Thanksgiving and my son’s first visit in almost 5 years!  As I was searching for a must absolutely have item, a woman of my age (a senior!) had her cart blocking me.  She was so apologetic as she had been on her cell phone and was focused on the conversation.  No problem, I just got off the phone with my daughter, wanting to know if I could pick up what she needed to cook for Thanksgiving.  We talked about the good old days when you weren’t interrupted and didn’t know who called until you got home and listened to the answering machine.
        Then I remarked that cell phones were also a positive thing as I could just pick up what my daughter needed rather than go home and go out again.  That’s when she said she was talking to her 14 year-old granddaughter who was in the store looking for her.  We joked about how the teen years can be so challenging and that’s when she told me that her granddaughter’s mother died of cancer and was just buried this past Wednesday.  I asked if that was “her” daughter and she shook her head yes.  As her granddaughter rounded the corner with her dad, I felt real caring for this family.  My co-moderator’s mother recently passed away and it’s difficult to adequately express the sympathy one feels.
        All of a sudden, I felt both embarrassed and grateful.  Embarrassed that I thought my day was so overwhelming.  Grateful that I was placed in that store, in that aisle and was shown the most important gift on any day and that is love.  I have learned so much about giving and receiving love through WFS.  All I could do was say I’m sorry to this family.  This was a tearful lesson, a reminder of how love appears in unexpected ways and moments in our lives.  We just need to be aware.  Sobriety has given me the beautiful gifts of awareness, appreciation, tender moments, being available, feeling, really feeling deep emotions.
        May this Thanksgiving be one filled with love and may you share your love with those you hold dear in your heart and if it turns out that you are feeling lonely or alone, take this time to perhaps reach out to others who are feeling the same way.  They are out there in this world.  Giving and receiving love does change the course of your world!  -WFS Member
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© WFS Inc. * Women for Sobriety, Inc., PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org  *  Ph: 215-536-8026  * Fax: 215-538-9026
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C  *  Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services ~ Thank you!