Women for Sobriety, Inc. is a non-profit organization dedicated to helping women overcome alcoholism and other addictions. It is, in fact, the first national self-help recovery program for women alcoholics. The WFS "New Life" Program helps women achieve sobriety and sustain ongoing recovery. WFS has been providing services to women alcoholics since July 1975. This blog has been created to share news, events, and encouragement to those interested in the organization and the program.
on yourself first, take responsibility for your own progress.”-I Ching
philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one
makes…and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility.”-Eleanor Roosevelt
sign of wisdom and maturity is when you come to terms with the realization that
your decisions cause your rewards and consequences.You are responsible for your life, and your
ultimate success depends on the choices you make.”-Denis Waitley
“I am in charge of my mind, my thoughts and
my life” is an incredibly powerful sentence.Completely unaware of this ability before my
New Life, I lived in opposition, blame and felt utterly powerless.It felt as though everything was impossible
and responsibility was something to fear.
of the reasons I am so passionate about Women for Sobriety is these thirteen
Statements change lives and lay a foundation for empowerment.In the past, I lived life through eyes of a
victim and retreated into alcohol for relief.This not only didn’t solve a thing, I created further dependencies
which, over time, tore away my identity.Self-value and worth became what others needed or took which crushed my
#13 in action is empowering.Discovering
the ability to manage my own mind, I began to unlearn unhealthy behaviors and
institute fresh lines of thinking.These
thoughts translated into action and I soon found myself living in a state of
response-ability.I began to define and
create my own experiences and success instead of trying to fit into a one-size-fits-all
box.Connecting with women in face to
face meetings and the WFS Online Forum, I began to learn about what
responsibility is and isn’t, which eased my fears.A whole new world of choice seemed to open
right in front of me.Opportunities
never dreamt of came into view, leading to feelings of renewed spirit and
empowerment.I am in charge of my mind,
my thoughts and my life.You are too!Hugzzz, Karen
use Statement 13 whenever I feel overwhelmed with decisions that need to be
made.My mind gets a bit scattered and I
tell myself that no matter what the outcome, I am in charge of myself!In the past I was afraid to make decisions
because I didn’t trust my instincts, feared failure and was not prepared to cope
with it.Never looked at failure as a
life lesson, just plain old failure.One
of the side effects of my failing is that I have become a seeker of
information.I take my time in making
decisions as I gather pertinent information.The second side effect is that I now trust my instincts.My many failures have filled my baggage full
with invaluable lessons.I once read
that we are free to choose but not free from the consequences of our choices.If I make a wrong choice, I put the
consequences in my baggage of life-lessons.No tearing myself apart because there is no lesson learned in that
behavior.As I practice Statement 13, I
also begin removing the negative baggage that crushed my self-worth.This is why it’s imperative to learn, to grow
emotionally and spiritually, to forgive ourselves so that we live as empowered
women.We are in charge of our lives
through the ups and downs, mistakes, right choices, failures and successes.
Consider these questions:
·How do you react/respond to failure?
·Can you name the life-lessons you have gained
in failure or success?
·Do you give yourself credit for your successes
understanding that you do make healthy choices?
·What is an unhealthy behavior that you have
·What have you replaced it with?
·Describe the last time you trusted your
instinct – the situation, the people, the outcome.
·Can you create a positive mantra that empowers
“Life is change,
growth is possible, choose wisely” -WFS
felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery, --air, mountains, trees,
people.I thought, ‘this is what it is
to be happy.”-Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar
is not something readymade.It comes
from your own actions.”-Dalai Lama
is the consequence of personal effort.You
fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes travel around the
world looking for it.You have to
participate relentlessly the manifestations of your own blessings.And once you have achieved a state of
happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it.You must make a mighty effort to keep
swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.”-Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love
#3 encourages insight and action.Jean
Kirkpatrick states in our Program
Booklet, “Happiness is a feeling that comes from an inner contentment,
comes from being pleased with ourselves.”A personal example of applying this Statement was when I learned our
youngest Chihuahua was diagnosed with congestive heart failure.Noticing that he had started having
difficulty breathing, our veterinarian immediately diagnosed the problem and he
experiencing and moving through the initial sadness, these feelings evolved
into a sense of contentment.The issue had
been identified, the medication was working, and more importantly, my feelings
shifted into gratitude and I began to luxuriate in the moments beside my
the past, alcohol would have stripped my ability to move past those initial, emotionally
painful feelings.With WFS and action
into Statement #3, I feel a deep sense of inner contentment knowing that I can
move through difficulties and feel pleased with my response.Instead of turning to alcohol for relief, I
have tools to live and experience life with greater ease.Today, I understand there is a wide spectrum
to happiness that includes acceptance and contentment. Hugzzz,
have a book on happiness: “Field Guide
to Happiness” by Barbara Ann Kipfer.This
book has 4 sections - Lists, Mind-Mapping, Keeping a Journal and
Miscellaneous.Now that last section
intrigued me so I looked at it first.It
is chuck full of ideas to create happiness - 48 to be exact.I’m not a fast reader so I skimmed over it
and included a few.
·Describe your favorite songs and how they make you feel.Music stirs powerful emotions.
·Read something that you want to read, not something that you feel compelled to read.
·Create an “Alter” on your desk or by your bed – not something necessarily religious but more spiritual and cheering.
·Open up your options for using simple means to raise your spirits.Whatever you choose should replenish you, add to your fulfillment, nurture calmness or patience or general happiness.
·Approach new experiences as opportunities to learn rather than occasions to succeed or fail.Doing so opens you up to new possibilities and can increase your sense of happiness.
·Seek out personal quiet time – resisting the idea that it’s a waste of time or it’s not working for you.
·Give – in any way you can – time, help, money, stuff.By being fully present and cultivating gratitude, generosity and kindness, we can find the renewable source of happiness in ourselves in each moment.
·Drift – Let your mind drift for a few minutes.Watch the clouds floating by or the fish swimming in an aquarium; observe the wind in the trees or grass, a fire in the fireplace, stars in the night sky.Let go and let be.Observe without judgement.
·Create something you can tend to.We often tend to the little rips, tears and loose buttons of life.But how about tending something where you are actually nurturing growth?
·Add dance.Dance when the spirit moves you.Disappear in the dance.Dance as if you are expressing your gratitude for living.In general, let life be more of a dance and less of a battle.Dance a little bit each day.
ago, I thought that it was the responsibility of others to make me happy.I placed a great burden on them, an
impossible task.Thank goodness WFS
included this very invaluable statement and lesson for me to live by.I also learned there is a difference between
people who care about me and do things that create happy moments and times for
me and expecting them to do so.I
find immense joy in helping others, in sharing my life experience with the hope
that I can bring encouragement to others, experience love and find happiness in
being with my family and friends and lastly, I absolutely love to decorate for
Spring, Fall and Winter.When all the
decorations are on display, I have this big smile across my face and in my
heart.There are many loving memories
attached to my decorations.
brings you happiness and joy?
of the ideas above do you think you can incorporate into your life to build or
enhance your foundation of happiness?
Invite your family, friends,
neighbors, co-workers, group members, online friends... everyone can get
involved and bid! This is a fundraiser for Women for Sobriety and your contributions are greatly needed and appreciated!
There are varied 'end' dates so please keep an eye on the item you are bidding on to be sure you don't miss when it closes. We may have items closing out AFTER the 15th.
There are also NEW ITEMS being listed over the next several days.
Here's the link to check on for ALL ITEMS UP FOR AUCTION:
#10 “All love given returns” was the theme for our Conference in June and WFS
continues to see, feel as well as need,
your support and love.Continuing
with this theme, it is a thrill to announce our first ever eBay Fundraiser!This exciting new fundraising event starts on
October 6 and runs through the 15th.
can put Statement #10 into action and participate by inviting your family,
friends, neighbors, co-workers; everyone can get involved!If you have an eBay account and have items to
list and sell, follow the provided link below.If you do not have an account, please consider creating one so that you
can directly participate in this wonderful new fundraiser with WFS!
is a 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and our mission is simple, to help all
women find their individual path to recovery.We recognize each woman’s necessity for self-discovery and our vision is
to encourage each woman in developing personal growth and continued abstinence
through our New Life Program.Please
join us in this marvelous new adventure!Hugzzz,
am so glad that Karen has reminded us of the eBay Auction in support of
WFS.There are so many ways to give and
receive love.The eBay auction is one
way to show love for an organization that has changed lives in such a powerful
have learned a lot about love in WFS.I
mentioned in previous messages that I always thought love referred to romantic
love.WFS taught me that love occurs in
various ways; from learning the importance of self-love, to forming loving and
supportive relationships and the unconditional love given to us by our adorable
have experienced loving friendships from the wonderful women I have met in
WFS.There have been times over the
years, and especially this past year, that I have been struggling emotionally.It is the loving support that I have received
from my WFS sisters that has helped keep me strong and focused.This support is part of the reason I
encourage everyone to find some way to give back to WFS whether it is continuing
to attend meetings, financial
on a committee or becoming
a moderator/co-moderator/chat leader.Part of my giving back has been moderating a WFS group for 27 years.I want to be there for every single woman
that has the courage to walk through the door to attend a face to face meeting
for the first time.While I may not be a
chat leader on the Forum,
there are many dedicated women who volunteer their time to lead meetings and
help is available 24/7 for those in need.
a moderator for me is to be a role model yet the bond is that all of us are
women in/or seeking a healthy recovery.This
is the most loving part of the friendships I have made in WFS.The group supports me when I need
encouragement.I receive emails from the
Monday messages, thanking Karen and myself for sharing our personal feelings
and history.This is all part of all
love given returns.I am blessed beyond
measure for the love I have received.
to think about when it comes to love and relationships.Heard this on a TV show last night.“Relationships
are the cornerstone of life.They are
the place that we go to, to find comfort, connection, companionship.Relationships are also the places that we go
to act out whatever it is we learned in life about ourselves, about love, about
·When considering how all love given returns,
how are you experiencing and receiving love?
·Is there comfort, connection, companionship or
are you acting out in a way that blocks giving and receiving love?
·What actions can you take to break down any
walls that you feel are creating distance from both giving and receiving love?
·How does your way of giving and receiving love
impact and protect your sobriety?
·Is your fear of being vulnerable keeping
relationships from being formed?
·How can you build trust in giving and