Monday, August 14, 2017

Monday's Message ~ Statement #12




҉

 “To know one’s own limitations is the hallmark of competence.”  -Dorothy L. Sayers 

“Everybody’s got a different circle of competence.  The important thing is not how big the circle is.  The important thing is staying inside the circle.”  -Warren Buffet

“We must believe in ourselves or no one will believe in us; we must match our aspirations with the competence, courage and determination to succeed.”  -Rosalyn Yalow 

*************************************************************
Statement #12, “I am a competent woman and have much to give life.”
This is what I am and I shall know it always.
*************************************************************
+++++++++++++++++++
+ Karen’s Perspective +
+++++++++++++++++++
        Reflecting on Statement #12, it is enlightening to uncover this journey of competence in my New Life.  What I have observed is every single day sober is a demonstration of competence; by not doing this one thing every day I open the door to competence and accomplishment.
        Alcohol removed the ability to recognize and feel competence.  So often setting a time or setting limits with alcohol were quickly abandoned, which in turn severed any feelings of competence or ability.  Compounding these feelings of failure daily resulted in overwhelming feelings of self-doubt.  I no longer felt capable of doing anything.  Even the smallest of tasks seemed insurmountable.
        Statement #12 encourages each woman to continually build frameworks of ability and awareness.  This started my first day sober and continues into this current moment.  With each new day, I began erasing feelings of failure and applying a fresh coat of competence.  Compounding these feelings from the practice of Statement #12 results in the ability to understand and grow competence, while instilling awareness that I can ask for help at any time.
Hugzzz, Karen

++++++++++++++++++
+  Member Insights  +
++++++++++++++++++
Hi 4C Women,

Many women find it challenging to introduce themselves as a competent woman when first attending WFS meetings.  I initially felt that way.  However, I also began to understand that the more I said it, the more I began believing it.  I had this strong need to prove that underneath all of my fears that I could change those old negative messages of who I “thought” I was.  The more I practiced taking risks, trusting that I would survive, learning and growing into a competent woman, the more comfortable I began to feel in trusting my choices.  Fear and trust – overcoming and becoming.

I would encourage you to take a risk or two and examine the outcome with an open mind.  Perhaps it didn’t work out as you had hoped yet there is much to learn from trying.  That is how I feel competence begins to grow.  You try, you learn, make more informed choices next time and, mostly, appreciate and acknowledge the strong effort you made in becoming that competent woman.  It’s that trial and error method that informs us and builds a strong foundation of courage, insight and believing in your own personal strengths.

·         What are you willing to risk to gain this knowledge and belief in yourself?
·         What did you learn from your previous decision?
·         How will you use that information to build your competency?
·         Do you recognize the strength in seeking help and actually reach out for it?
·         Do you acknowledge your victories in gaining competency?
 
We need to be our own best cheerleaders for this is how we build that positive definition of who we are and are becoming – 4C women indeed!  -WFS Member
_____________________________________________________________________
© Women for Sobriety, Inc. | PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org | Ph: 215-536-8026 | Fax: 215-538-9026
Join our Email Service by clicking HERE or text your email address to WFSORG at 22828.
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C | Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
When you shop at smile.amazon.com, Amazon donates to Women for Sobriety.
PayPal Giving Fund: 100% of your donation reaches WFS and contributes to our mission.

DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services. Thank you!

Wednesday, August 9, 2017

WFS Beginner's Special


Beginners Special Bundle
  

Special Package To Start

Your “New Life” Journey Into Recovery



 
Retail Price: $35.95

Sale Price: $30.75


REVIEWS - What Members Have to Say:
 
Doris: Like a lot of women before me, I lurked on the online forum message boards for a while before I ever ordered the Beginner’s Special.  When I got it, I didn’t do anything with it right away.  However, what a difference it made in my journey when I actually read the material and listened to the tape [CD].  I carry Jean’s tape with me and listen to it when I’m walking.  I can relate to a lot of her thoughts, and hearing her actual voice has meant a lot to me.  I feel like she’s talking just to me.  I can’t stress enough to anyone who thinks they’re using this program by just using the online forum...the message boards are not the program.  Order the Beginner’s Special.  It will make a huge difference in your sobriety journey and it may mean the difference between staying sober and drinking.

Ruth Ann: When I received my Beginner’s Special in the mail, I read everything cover to cover.  It took me, unfortunately, another 7 months to stop drinking.  I have a wine glass stain on the front cover of Turnabout.  I use to think how awful this was, drinking and reading at the same time… can I do this?  I woke up once with the book stuck to my chest.  Something, of course, was sinking in.  The words are powerful, and I realize now it was part of the process.

TeddyBear: The Beginner’s Special is a “SPECIAL PACKAGE TO START YOUR “NEW LIFE” JOURNEY INTO RECOVERY.”  It took me several reads of the material to finally start to absorb it.  I think that is because my brain was pickled.  It took me another 3½ months to put it into continuous practice.  There would be a week, then several weeks, then a month and then things really started rolling and I am not going back.  I keep the Beginner’s Booklet and the Program Booklet in my journal.  I refer to them often.  I know that, at some point, I will probably buy new copies.  This is a wonderful gift to give yourself or someone you know who is struggling.  It is a life saver!

Shirley: If you have never ordered anything from the WFS catalog, this is a great start.  It’s loaded with information about the program.  It gives you encouragement, especially on the difficult days when the “imp” [impulse] is breathing over your shoulder.  I know I spent many hours reading Jean’s literature, listening to the tape [CD] until I knew it almost word for word.

Dougal: I was at my personal rock bottom and it seemed like it took forever for it to arrive.  I was lurking on the online message boards, of course, and that’s how I joined WFS and finally got that Beginner’s Special.  For me, I swear it was like honey to a starving bee.  The book Turnabout was terribly hard to read because it was so graphic in its description of what alcohol can do to a body and soul.  The Beginner’s package is the first ray of hope.  It’s priceless and, even if you don’t or can’t use it right away or even if you can’t read all of it or think it is silly or whatever at first; don’t give up on it.  It will change your life.

Toots: The Beginner’s Special was the first thing I ordered when I joined Women for Sobriety.  I’d heard about it from members of the online forum.  The items included in the Beginner’s Special provided me with the information I needed to get better acquainted with the WFS “New Life” Program and overall philosophy of Women for Sobriety.  Sure is a great bargain to boot!

_____________________________________________________________________
© Women for Sobriety, Inc. | PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org | Ph: 215-536-8026 | Fax: 215-538-9026

Join our Email Service by clicking HERE or text your email address to WFSORG at 22828.
 
 
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C | Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
 
DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services. Thank you!

Monday, August 7, 2017

Monday's Message ~ Statement #8





҉
 

“Between stimulus and response there is a space.  In that space is our power to choose our response.  In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”  -Viktor E. Frankl

“The key to growth is the introduction of higher dimensions of consciousness into our awareness.”
-Lao Tzu

“I always feel that until you take your last breath, you’re always growing.”  -Oprah Winfrey

************************************************************************
Statement #8, “The fundamental object of life is emotional and spiritual growth.”
Daily I put my life into a proper order, knowing which are the priorities.
************************************************************************

+++++++++++++++++++
+ Karen’s Perspective +
+++++++++++++++++++
        The WFS Program, most notably Statement #8, have provided the opportunity for understanding life with fresh perspective.  In the past, given a set of guidelines to assist with growth only sent me spiraling in the opposite direction.  I felt a failure even before starting and so often felt “what’s the use?” or “I’m too far gone.”  Understanding growth to be the object of life, I felt an incredible shift in perspective.
        An example of growth in my New Life can best be summed up from a recent experience.  Flying north for the wedding of my sister last week, upon arrival, I realized the beautiful dress purchased for this blessed event was back in a hotel room.  Panic instantly arose, with other distressing emotions coming swiftly, filling my body with anxiety and anger yet, curiously, these feelings didn’t last long.  Without warning, a feeling of calm arose with the realization that I could spend the afternoon shopping with the bride to be, my daughter and sister in law.  What was an initially, difficult circumstance quickly turned into a delightful opportunity.
        Before sobriety and New Life, the reaction would have been intense and dramatic.  My victim-stance would have been shared across every social platform while secretly basking in all the attention.  Playing on the emotions of others and dragging down the joyous event would have taken high priority (consciously or not).  But this did not happen.  Instead, I shared in a fun (and silly) shopping excursion with family.  Sobriety and Statement #8 in action assisted in developing a different perspective on this wedding weekend.  The stark contrast in before and after reactions is evidence of how effective and rewarding Statement #8 can be when practiced and embraced.

Are you aware of growth in your New Life?  Priorities?
How does this feel for you?

Hugzzz,
Karen 

++++++++++++++++++
+  Member Insights  +
++++++++++++++++++

Hi 4C Women,

I give Karen a lot of credit for taking that stance in her situation.  It is a great example of how we put the Statements into action.  Her openness in sharing how she would have reacted in the past was quite refreshing and very insightful.  As I read it, I saw myself in years past - the victim, the need for attention and not giving serious consideration to the impact my words, my behavior had on others.  I didn’t care because I was very needy.  Learning to fulfill my needs, to even know my needs, was an important and necessary part of my emotional growth journey.  I learned that expecting others to fulfill all my needs placed a great burden and strain on my relationships.  I also learned the difference between seeking support and expecting others to rescue me or at least listen endlessly to my drama with no change in sight. 

What all of this soul-searching led to was:
·         A much greater awareness of what my needs were/are and that they change over time.
·         Discovering various ways to meet those needs and following through on doing so.  This is critical.  While having insight is great, without action things will remain the same and Statement 8 is all about “growth”.
·         Awareness to stop myself when I realized I was creating unnecessary drama.  This was a challenging habit to break yet absolutely crucial in moving forward.
·         Became a better listener which makes me laugh sometimes as I am sure those whose ears I bent were grateful for this change!
·         Problem-solver, decision-maker.  Now that was huge since I never really wanted to change, I just wanted people to feel sorry for me and I honestly didn’t want their advice because that goes back to me changing. 

The biggest reward for putting Statement 8 into action is FREEDOM.  I am now free to explore, uncover, discover, say no, say yes, be a lot more compassionate, authentically connected to others, definitely competent whether I make a mistake in my decision-making, appreciate and value the support and input of others because I am truly listening which helps in my problem-solving.  This list of rewards is endless and I am so grateful for WFS guiding me in such a positive, healthy direction.

«  What are your rewards?
«  What changes have you made in following through on the action part of Statement 8?
«  What are your needs?
-WFS Member
_____________________________________________________________________
© Women for Sobriety, Inc. | PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org | Ph: 215-536-8026 | Fax: 215-538-9026
Join our Email Service by clicking HERE or text your email address to WFSORG at 22828.
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C | Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
When you shop at smile.amazon.com, Amazon donates to Women for Sobriety.
PayPal Giving Fund: 100% of your donation reaches WFS and contributes to our mission.

DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services. Thank you!

Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Monday's Message ~ Statement #6

 


҉

 “Don’t make the process harder than it is.”  -Jack Welch

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.”  -Confucius
 
“There is no greatness where there is not simplicity, goodness and truth.”  -Leo Tolstoy

*******************************************************************************
Statement #6, “Life can be ordinary or it can be great.”  Greatness is mine by a conscious effort.
*******************************************************************************
 
+++++++++++++++++++
+ Karen’s Perspective +
+++++++++++++++++++
        Sobriety and recovery need not be complicated.  In the past, I made things complicated with my alcohol use, repetitive thoughts and from dwelling in fear and uncertainty.  The WFS Statements provide a life affirming course to follow which can carve out beautiful simplicity from an overly complicated existence.
        Statement #6 epitomizes this simplicity by providing choice.  Life can be ordinary or it can be great.  It is up to each woman to decide what she needs.  Since my life was so drama-filled before sobriety, I wanted and needed to learn how to embrace the ordinary moments available to me.  The beauty of a sunset, the clean fresh air, or chatting with a friend are all simple moments that feel great to me.
        Alcohol complicates abilities, thinking and can wreak havoc on the human body, creating imbalance and confusion.  Sobriety and recovery opens the door to simplicity through the WFS Statements, which can arrive slowly yet at other times at warp speed.  Simplicity feels so much more comfortable, like a well-loved blanket or that favorite pair of shoes.  No matter your preference, life is simply great sober!
Hugzzz,
Karen
 
++++++++++++++++++
+  Member Insights  +
++++++++++++++++++
Hi 4C Women,
        I’m not sure I agree with Confucius that life is simple; however, I have to admit that there have been times when I made situations more complicated with my reactions due to my inability to process what was really happening.  I just plain reacted!  I love how Karen defined life being ordinary or great.  After all these years, I had not considered seeing ordinary as also being great depending on what I needed at any even given moment.  It’s a relief to think about it that way.  It reminds me of the positives we share at the f2f meetings.  It’s not a competition, it’s how we handled a situation differently, felt differently or responded in a more positive, healthy manner.  So it is with life being ordinary or life being great.  Greatness can be felt in the ordinary if that is what we are experiencing at that moment or in experiencing something new, taking a risk, facing our fears.  The beauty of Statement #6 is that we are able to learn and make different choices as we become aware of our recovery goals.

Questions to consider:

·         What was the last fear you faced and took the challenge to work through it?
·         How did that risk change your outlook on life being ordinary or great?
·         Do you know what your needs are now to create a great life, remembering that the ordinary can be great?
·         Have you chosen a path that will create the life you want?  If not, what is the stumbling block?
·         If you have created your ordinary, great life, consider sharing your strategies with those who are struggling.

Bonded through encouragement and support,
WFS Member
_____________________________________________________________________
© Women for Sobriety, Inc. | PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org | Ph: 215-536-8026 | Fax: 215-538-9026
Join our Email Service by clicking HERE or text your email address to WFSORG at 22828.
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C | Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
When you shop at smile.amazon.com, Amazon donates to Women for Sobriety.
PayPal Giving Fund: 100% of your donation reaches WFS and contributes to our mission.

DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services. Thank you!

Sunday, July 30, 2017

Monday's Message ~ Statement #5

 


҉

 “The game of life is the game of boomerangs.  Our thoughts, deeds and words return to us sooner or later, with astounding accuracy.”  -Florence Shinn

“You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.”  -James Allen

“Thinking is easy, acting is difficult, and to put one’s thoughts into action is the most difficult thing in the world.”  -Goethe

*************************************************************
Statement #5, “I am what I think.”
I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman.
*************************************************************

+++++++++++++++++++
+ Karen’s Perspective +
+++++++++++++++++++
        Long before I had ever heard of WFS, I began to practice Statement #5.  Where or when this happened is not as important as the fact that it happened.  Thoughts of sobriety slowly began to enter my mind, and while these initial thoughts brought about anxiety and deep fear, they also brought an inkling of relief.  This was the beginning and first glimpse of sobriety and a beautiful new way of life.
        Statement #5 in action provides a portal for possibility.  No matter the thought, action can sprout from within, just as Jean Kirkpatrick states in our Program Booklet:  “First the thought, then the reality.”  Sobriety and recovery grows and flourishes with thoughts that are tended to in a 4C garden.  When this soil is enhanced with such nutrients as caring and compassion, a foundation for unlimited growth is unearthed.
        Tending to this fresh and bountiful garden requires daily effort; planting seeds of joy, balance and independence, managing those pesky negative or doubtful weeds when they crop up and gently watering the blossoming bed with life sustaining love, produce a variety of continuing growth and flowering moments that are available to harvest for a lifetime.
How do you tend to your growing garden of recovery?
Hugzzz,
Karen

++++++++++++++++++
+  Member Insights  +
++++++++++++++++++
Hi 4C Women,
        This morning the message in my church was on joy and contentment.  As I sat there, I thought about how much my life was changed because of the WFS program.  It is through the Statements that I learned to build a much needed foundation of peace and contentment.  As we all know, sobriety/being clean is not a promise of a perfect life, far from it.  What it gives us is the opportunity to practice being a 4C woman.  We have challenges, wonderful moments, scary moments, sadness and joy and through it all, we need to work on personal and emotional growth.  As we do this, it becomes clear that this is hard work yet so rewarding.  I can say that my identity, self-perception, and the words I used to describe myself in the past were cruel, negative and untrue.  I took over for all those people who bullied me, criticized me and broke my spirit.  It’s known by many as the Inner Critic, the one who is eager to point out each mistake and wrong choices to confirm the long ago held negative opinion of ourselves.  It also acts as a protector of sorts.  If I believe the Inner Critic’s negative definition of me, i.e., you’re not smart enough, then it has prepared me for rejection.  It lessens the fear because I am prepared and expecting it.  If I don’t feel like a 4C Woman, I won’t have to deal with the painful feelings that “might” occur.  Believing the Inner Critic assures that emotional growth and positive change will not take place.
        Statement 9 comes to mind whenever I think of the Inner Critic.  He holds onto the past to victimize us and that is his joy.  This is why Statement 5 is so important to practice, to believe, for it is how we learn to believe in ourselves, build our self-esteem, to develop a truthful, accurate definition of who we are TODAY!  We know that if we make mistakes, it cannot destroy our identity.  A mistake is a life lesson not a lifelong curse to keep us down.
        The last words on the screen as the service ended today spoke to me, “It never gets easier, you just get better.”  I mentioned this a few weeks ago that I thought life would be so much easier at my age but this is not the case.  I have learned to handle the challenges better because I am a 4C woman, thanks to the guidance of WFS and my commitment to change - my thoughts and my actions.   -WFS Member

List what you are…
·         Capable of:
·         Competent in:
·         Caring about:
·         Compassionate about:
_____________________________________________________________________
© Women for Sobriety, Inc. | PO Box 618, Quakertown PA 18951
Email: contact@womenforsobriety.org | Ph: 215-536-8026 | Fax: 215-538-9026
Join our Email Service by clicking HERE or text your email address to WFSORG at 22828.
Daily Inspirations on Twitter: @WFS4C | Check out the WFS Blog: http://wfsorg.blogspot.com
When you shop at smile.amazon.com, Amazon donates to Women for Sobriety.
PayPal Giving Fund: 100% of your donation reaches WFS and contributes to our mission.

DONATE NOW ~ Your Donations Help Support WFS’s Services. Thank you!